Not everyone could manage a snafoo like this one/OR/ Move over Lucy Ricardo!

This is a copy of an email that I wrote to Lorraine (the ultra-endurance runner) after I did something particularly stupid:

I know how much you like to hear about my little misadventures, so I thought I'd tell you about the newest one. Hey, it's been awhile...

Anyway, maybe you don't remember but once upon a time, back before you saved my ass up there on Hwy 1 I asked you how to train so that it didn't hurt so much over long distances. Like should I make my long runs longer, my in-between runs longer, do more strength training? Your answer: Celebrex (or some other prescription arthritis medication). You even gave me the sterling advice to go in to a doctor and fake arthritis symptoms (at 21 years of age, mind you). Anyway, I never got to the point where I was lying to medical professionals, but I do believe that Alieve is the best invention since the wheel. I took like 3 bottles of it out here with me. I also took some generic tylenol pm for my insomnia spells, some nyquil (which didn't last long), some tumms (which didn't last long either), and some multivitamins (which are mostly full still). SO, I've been telling everyone I was training for the marathon since November, but I didn't really actually get around to the RUNNING part of the training until January. Apparently paying the entry fee doesn't automatically put you in shape. The marathon's 3 weeks from today. I've been recklessly lengthening my long runs since January, and today it was time to do that last 20+ mile run. Coincidentally today was also the Barcelona half marathon, so I decided to run around a bit before and then run home and hopefully that would cover it. (Ok, now I swear I'm getting to the point.) But for a Claire (especially an out of shape one), 20 miles still hurts a lot, and I didn't want to feel it. So before I walked out the door I took 2 alieve. Only when I reached for my keys and took a second look at the bottle I noticed that they weren't alieve, but the tylenol PM (generic brand: same color scheme). I immediately went into the bathroom and stuck my fingers down my throat, but I didn't see any little blue submarines come up. I still have a LITTLE bit of dignity and I wasn't about to go poking at my puke with a toothbrush looking for them. So I just took 2 more REAL alieve and ran out the door. I have no idea if I ran for several hours today sedated. I felt a little float-y, but that could be because I haven't been doing a lot of long workouts. My tummy was a little yucky, but that could have been because I stuck my fingers down my throat 5 minutes before starting running.

On a positive note, it's now almost midnight and my legs feel fine. I just can't sleep.